Clearly, she was out of her mind with fever

things for sale Buried among the usual pile of crap-mail this past week, was an unexpected gem. Of course, I didn’t realize what a gem it was at first glance, which is typical of most good things. I mean, whoever found the first crusty diamond all wrapped up in carbon probably thought, “What’s this piece of crap?” right before he smacked it to pieces with a hammer.

And so it was that I almost tossed it aside with the rest of the mail (in the recycle bin of course!) but then I stopped–re-read the notice, “It’s time for our Wildwood Springs Annual Neighborhood Yard Sale” and immediately started running the possibilities in my mind!

I’ve mentioned that I’m not generally a packrat, but I will say that there are a few things I can’t bear to throw out. While CareerMom had the boys tax-free “back to school shopping” on Saturday, (right before she fell ill to the same ailment that caused MLE to puke all over the place), I scrounged around in the basement for items that perhaps I could toss aside, and maybe make a few dollars off of.

Surprisingly, I came up with a pretty good list of crap useful items:

  • a pair of Kenwood side speakers (with drops of what appears to be solder on them, giving them a cool, hip, silver splashy look!)
  • various cords and cables
  • a turkey fryer that I’ve used all of twice, and only once for frying an actual turkey
  • two pairs of “his n’ hers” roller blades from mine and CareerMom’s single days. Seriously, we used these maybe all of three times when we were “dating” and haven’t put them back on since.
  • two small coolers, cuz my fabulous new cooler that I got for a “Thank You” award at work is clearly superior
  • a telephone
  • a network bridge
  • a serial port a/b switch
  • and a few more odds and ends

But then, as I perused the stack of stuff with a buyer’s eye, I wasn’t convinced that there was enough there to justify the $15 fee AND to justify my sitting on my can all day long drinking cheap beer while CareerMom occupied the boys.

But then, hark! What are those bins over there in the dark corner? Could those be “baby clothes” that we apparently have no need for?

Do you realize what we have here? Baby clothes are the “Holy Grail” of Yard Sale beacons. Why, with these, I could fairly hire a teenager to come work my driveway while I went about my business the rest of the weekend!

But then…a thought…

Will CareerMom be willing to part with them?”

Because despite both of us wailing in moments of despair, “NO MORE CHILDREN!” I secretly suspected that she might capitulate and therefore want to hold onto these clothes on the chance that God saw fit to give us YET another boy!

That evening as we were sitting around having dinner, I casually remarked, “So, I’m thinking about doing the neighborhood Yard Sale thing this year. I mean, I have a lot of junk of my own I can get rid of.”

Without skipping a beat, CareerMom said, “Yeah and all of those old baby clothes down in the basement can go too…”

I nearly fell out of my chair! Even more shocking was the fact that, later that evening, she went down, unprompted, and brought up all the bins and went through them discarding what she didn’t want to keep for sentimental reasons. And it was about 95% of the stuff!

Little did I know then that in less than 10 hours, she’d have her head buried in the toilet and running a fever. So maybe that’s why she was so agreeable. Either way, it’s too late now! I’ve hidden the unwanted bins of clothes and she’s not going to see them again until I put them out for sale in September.

But did you hear that? No more kids! For sure!

Unless we crazy kids get caught up in the moment one day and get lazy!

3 thoughts on “Clearly, she was out of her mind with fever

  1. That’s hilarious that a yard sale flyer prompted a family planning discussion. You are right…baby items are solid gold at yard sales. Roller blades sound pretty good too. Are you sure you want to give those up?

    That sounds like a nasty bug. May CareerMom experience a speedy recovery!

    RE: Miracles often come from the most unexpected places!
    And oh yes, I plan on never donning a pair of roller blades again. I have no arches in my feet, so roller blading is just painful; plus, nothing says “Move on” like seeing a 45-year old man trying to keep up with their teenager in a sport they have no business participating in (e.g., Roller Blading!).

  2. “nothing says “Move on” like seeing a 45-year old man trying to keep up with their teenager in a sport they have no business participating in (e.g., Roller Blading!).”

    Hey! Watch it , Mister! Bio-Mom LIKES to do things like rollerblading, whitewater rafting and other assorted “age-inappropriate” things! Wanna make something of it. BUB?!!

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