Tag: Roswell

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A Boy's Life Dad Blogs Family Life in these United States

Big Hair, Leg Warmers and a perfect family life. too good to be true?

My childhood was good, don’t get me wrong. I mean, it wasn’t Huxtable-good, but it was alright. The other day I was thinking about how television has changed since we of the “MTV Generation” were kids, and how big a part of my life TV was when I was growing up.  Do you remember it? Do you remember all of those popular family shows that we all used to watch and how those shows portrayed family life?

Family ties For example, one of my favorite shows growing up was Family Ties. Who could forget Alex and Mallory and whatever those other kids’ names were. I think they were the original dual-income family. The mom was some kind of business woman, as was the dad. Did we ever find out what they did for a living? Well, whatever it was, they made enough money to keep the kids in good clothes and to keep whatever out-of-town family member happened to drop by the house in spending cash until they left, usually after making a mess of home life.

Cosby show The Huxtables were a favorite too. I think my parents liked the Cosby Show because it had actors from their own era, but I liked the show because they were well-off (AKA rich!)…and lived like it! Isn’t it funny how, 20 years ago we didn’t even think about race when we were watching that show? Seems like we’ve gone backwards a bit since then doesn’t it?

Growing pains Who am I missing? Oh, man…Growing Pains! How I could I forget Growing Pains? Now this was the ultimate wasn’t it? Dad was a psychiatrist; mom was a…I don’t know what mom did, but she was hot! They lived in a nice ranch house with a basketball goal in the back. It was perfect.

Now, I knew in my heart that television wasn’t real life; but wasn’t there just a little part of all of us that thought that somewhere, life must be like that? And isn’t that view of family life what we all grew up with in our head?

So is it any surprise to us that we’re often dissatisfied with parenting? For certain, I never saw the Keatons getting up several times a night to comfort an inconsolable baby. Or, I don’t remember the Seavers sitting around the kitchen table stressing over whether or not they could afford to get rid of the 10-year old family car and get a new one.

Instead, according to our 80s television hero’s, life was supposed to be something like this:

  • Everyone suddenly shows up downstairs in the kitchen fully dressed and ready for breakfast
  • Dad sits at the table with a steaming mug of coffee in his hand and a newspaper in the other
  • Mom busily–yet expeditiously–serves everyone a hearty breakfast, while herself looking perfectly made up and coiffed and ready for her busy day as a working mom
  • Maybe dad works from home and while he does so, mom often pops in and out of the house and they have engaging, meaningful conversations about the family, work and life in general–all the while harmlessly flirting with one another.
  • Whatever dad did for a living, he had a LOT of free time
  • The kids would come home in the afternoon and fix themselves something to eat and disappear…off to do whatever they had to do.
  • Homework miraculously got done, or barring that, if one of those rascally kids got a “D” on their report card, they were mildly admonished while grinning winningly, knowing the parents would never follow through with any kind of lasting punishment.
  • At night, dinner was a family affair. Everyone sat down and ate whatever it was that magically appeared on the table. I don’t think anyone ever ate take-out and they certainly never went out to eat. Beef was good for you!
  • And I don’t think anyone ever went to bed, or if they did, it was after the show went off.
  • Vacations were European affairs, or at the very least, uber-exciting trips cross-country where everyone got along and traffic never hampered the schedule
  • Oh, and nothing ever, ever broke in the house.

Sounds pretty good doesn’t it? Too bad it’s about as far from real-life as you can get. Maybe that’s why Roseanne was such a big hit..it was bawdy and rough, but it was a heck of a lot more like MY childhood than anything Silver Spoons ever televised.

I wonder what my kids are going to glom onto growing up? Right now, I can’t think of any television shows that portrays an “ideal” family life. Maybe that’s a good thing though. Maybe it will help them create their own ideal, and in turn maybe that will help me to remain cognizant of the fact that my actions are the only thing countering the cultural norms today that I don’t agree with.

That’s a tall order.

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Dad Blogs Family Fatherhood

It’s OK. You can laugh. I won’t hold it against you.

Injury report

I could really make about a dozen points about this injury report that MLE (cat’s outta the bag…MLE’s name is Aiden) got today at daycare, but…oh, who am I kidding? I’m not noble!

In case you missed them:

  • I’m pretty sure it didn’t occur at 9:45 p.m. If so, then we really need to try and pick him up earlier
  • “…had got…”  “…had got…” let me say it again, “…had got…”  tsk, tsk, tsk

OK, I only have two real comments here, but still…dang!

And OK, but am I the only person who thinks this is funny?

Or am I just really a bad father?

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Dad Blogs Family Fatherhood

Clearly, she was out of her mind with fever

things for sale Buried among the usual pile of crap-mail this past week, was an unexpected gem. Of course, I didn’t realize what a gem it was at first glance, which is typical of most good things. I mean, whoever found the first crusty diamond all wrapped up in carbon probably thought, “What’s this piece of crap?” right before he smacked it to pieces with a hammer.

And so it was that I almost tossed it aside with the rest of the mail (in the recycle bin of course!) but then I stopped–re-read the notice, “It’s time for our Wildwood Springs Annual Neighborhood Yard Sale” and immediately started running the possibilities in my mind!

I’ve mentioned that I’m not generally a packrat, but I will say that there are a few things I can’t bear to throw out. While CareerMom had the boys tax-free “back to school shopping” on Saturday, (right before she fell ill to the same ailment that caused MLE to puke all over the place), I scrounged around in the basement for items that perhaps I could toss aside, and maybe make a few dollars off of.

Surprisingly, I came up with a pretty good list of crap useful items:

  • a pair of Kenwood side speakers (with drops of what appears to be solder on them, giving them a cool, hip, silver splashy look!)
  • various cords and cables
  • a turkey fryer that I’ve used all of twice, and only once for frying an actual turkey
  • two pairs of “his n’ hers” roller blades from mine and CareerMom’s single days. Seriously, we used these maybe all of three times when we were “dating” and haven’t put them back on since.
  • two small coolers, cuz my fabulous new cooler that I got for a “Thank You” award at work is clearly superior
  • a telephone
  • a network bridge
  • a serial port a/b switch
  • and a few more odds and ends

But then, as I perused the stack of stuff with a buyer’s eye, I wasn’t convinced that there was enough there to justify the $15 fee AND to justify my sitting on my can all day long drinking cheap beer while CareerMom occupied the boys.

But then, hark! What are those bins over there in the dark corner? Could those be “baby clothes” that we apparently have no need for?

Do you realize what we have here? Baby clothes are the “Holy Grail” of Yard Sale beacons. Why, with these, I could fairly hire a teenager to come work my driveway while I went about my business the rest of the weekend!

But then…a thought…

“Will CareerMom be willing to part with them?”

Because despite both of us wailing in moments of despair, “NO MORE CHILDREN!” I secretly suspected that she might capitulate and therefore want to hold onto these clothes on the chance that God saw fit to give us YET another boy!

That evening as we were sitting around having dinner, I casually remarked, “So, I’m thinking about doing the neighborhood Yard Sale thing this year. I mean, I have a lot of junk of my own I can get rid of.”

Without skipping a beat, CareerMom said, “Yeah and all of those old baby clothes down in the basement can go too…”

I nearly fell out of my chair! Even more shocking was the fact that, later that evening, she went down, unprompted, and brought up all the bins and went through them discarding what she didn’t want to keep for sentimental reasons. And it was about 95% of the stuff!

Little did I know then that in less than 10 hours, she’d have her head buried in the toilet and running a fever. So maybe that’s why she was so agreeable. Either way, it’s too late now! I’ve hidden the unwanted bins of clothes and she’s not going to see them again until I put them out for sale in September.

But did you hear that? No more kids! For sure!

Unless we crazy kids get caught up in the moment one day and get lazy!

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Dad Blogs Family Fatherhood Marriage

Behind every memory…is a Coffee Mug?

If there’s an adult male in your house over the age of 30, it’s a pretty good bet that if Gordon Elliott and the cast of “Doorknock Dinners” were to suddenly show up at your house and go scrounging through your pantry, they’d find a number of unmatched coffee mugs, complete with various pictures, logos, and catch-phrases.

I thought about this as I was emptying the dishwasher and trying to find a place for some of our mugs the other day. Now, CareerMom is an avowed packrat and I’m generally a “tosser” (and not in a British kinda way). I don’t normally get sentimental over knick-knacks so its easy for me to just throw things out.

Knowing this, I was taken aback to discover that, as I was moving the mugs around and trying to decide which ones to keep and which ones to toss out, that more than a few held very strong sentimental value. Like markers in my life, each of them pointed at some very good, or notsogood, time in my life and I was hesitant to get rid of them.

If you’re interested:

IMG_2320I got this mug at the Georgia Renaissance Festival back in 2000. CareerMom and I had just gotten married the fall prior and I had quit a very lucrative contract job (making the same money 9 years ago that I’m making now) so I could move back to Atlanta and get married. I remember that we really didn’t have much spending cash, but I really wanted one of these cool mugs (filled at the time of purchase, with beer) because it was a typically steamy June day and because I really liked the mug. So, CareerMom bought it for me and I’ve treasured it ever since.

IMG_2321I grew up in Alabama, and though I wasn’t lucky enough to go to the U. of Alabama, I will forever be a fan! CareerMom got her B.A. at U. of Texas and did her graduate studies at Georgia Tech. And though we don’t actually use these cups much, they are as much a part of our lives as anything else. I just can’t seem to part with them.

ROLL TIDE!

IMG_2322Much like my career, this mug symbolizes the hayday of my single life. I was young, I took contract jobs where I often got to do very fun and different things. One time, I worked for a railroad company planning a large telecommunications rollout. Part of my job was to help complete some maps. This was in the day before everything was on the Internet, so I was poring over what few maps were available via Mapquest, plus some maps we had on a program on disk, trying to figure out where the railroad tracks went across the U.S. The logo on this mug has long since worn off, but the underlying color is still there, shiny and bright. I don’t even remember specifically where I got it; only that it meant something special at the time. Still does really…

IMG_2325…the hell did this come from? It looks like something CareerMom got in a crappy “Thank You” basket at at a baby shower.
It’s outta here!

IMG_2324CareerMom brought this mug, along with a set of platters and such when we got married. I think I’ve seen a similar set at Target on and off over the years. But we pull these mugs out around the Christmas holidays. They are a beautiful green with a snowy scene on them that reminds me of the “Christmas that could be.” We will probably never have a white Christmas here in Atlanta, but like seeing the first leaves drop and feeling that first bite of cool Canadian air in October, these mugs always lift my spirits a bit.

IMG_2323When MLE was born, I wanted to make something people could keep. So, I took this picture of him, one of the very first,  and had a mug made up and sent it to all of our family members. For very obvious reasons, I can never throw this one out. I thought about this cup this morning as I was eating breakfast and MLE came down and asked to sit in my lap. I really love that little guy!

IMG_2327CareerMom brought this and another mug like it back from San Francisco recently. Not that I’m a fan of San Fran mind you, but the mugs are very interesting. The  scenery is raised on the mug making it a very tactile drinking experience. They also hold a LOT of coffee, which is a boon in the mornings when you’re already making umpteen trips up and down the stairs retrieving various things for the kids while trying to get ready. They seem kind of fragile though, so I suspect I’ll break them before I actually tire of them. Since these are relatively new, I’m not sure yet what the memory of these will be in 5 years. Perhaps thinking back of all the time I was able to spend with my boys by myself as she traveled for work. (*whisper* It’s kinda really fun when she’s gone!)

IMG_2326Ah, our old standby coffee mugs. These are our everyday, eat and drink whatever you want outta them, cups. Fruit, teas, coffee…they take them all. They aren’t flashy, but there’s lots of them and they do the job.

It’s kinda like our marriage really. Maybe they’re not the most exciting all the time, but they’re strong, and there whenever you need ’em.

People collect things specifically for the memories they make, but coffee cups are one of those things that you just sort of pick up along the way, no special reason. But, that’s what makes them special. Like the picture on the wall that, in time, you tend to ignore, pulling one of these gems out of the back of the cabinet and reliving the sentiment behind it is special.